The date has been selected. The guests are invited. The menu is in the works. But how should you set the table?
Whether you envision a formal or a casual vibe for a night in your dining room or al fresco, we’ve gathered all you need to know to properly set your table, plus some inspiration to give it a fabulous sense of style with your silver and crystal. Where should the glasses go and which ones do you need? Where should you place the napkins? It all depends, but we’re here to be your guide with some advice from Rebecca Gardner, founder and creative director of Houses & Parties.
But first let’s start with why we should even care about setting the table. “You’re creating a little 24-inch-wide world for each guest offering beauty, surprise, and delight,” Gardner says. “Setting the table is the ultimate gift for friends old and new. It sets the tone for the next three hours.”
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How to Set a Table
Before we get into a full-on formal table setting, let’s start with the most basic rule of table: “Outside in!,” Gardner sums it up in two words. Start with the utensils you plan to use first, and put them on the outermost sides of the place setting.
Salad forks go to the left of the dinner forks on the left side, soup spoons to the right of the knife (blades pointing in towards the plate!) on the right side. As the Emily Post Institute will tell you, you only need the utensils and dishes you plan to use—and nothing else. “These rules make sense and ease for guests,” Gardner says. “They’re not meant to intimidate.”
Juliska 5-Piece Berry & Thread Flatware Place Setting
Juliska 5-Piece Berry & Thread Flatware Place Setting
How to Set a Casual Table
For casual meals at home and weeknight dinners with the family, keep it simple. You can place the napkin to the left of the plate and put all the utensils on top with this order from left to right: fork, knife, spoon.
Alternately, you can place the napkin on the left with just the fork on top of or to the left of it, and then the knife and spoon to the right of the plate in that order. A water glass goes above the knife or to the top right of it at a 45-degree angle. Placemats typically anchor casual place settings and help with cleanup.
Set of Four Nostell Dashes & Palm Stripe Reversible Placemats - Air Force Blue
Set of Four Nostell Dashes & Palm Stripe Reversible Placemats - Air Force Blue
How to Set a Formal or Semi-Formal Table
The same basic setup applies, but to take things up a notch you just add any extra pieces needed for the meal. Add a salad fork to the left of the dinner fork and a wineglass to the outside of the water glass. If you are serving dessert, place a dessert fork and/or spoon at the top of the plate, or you can bring them to the table when you serve the meal’s decadent finale.
A bread plate, if being used, goes above the forks, with a butter knife on top of it. Stack a salad plate on top of the dinner plate and a soup bowl on top of that if you are using them. Chargers under plates are optional, as are placemats, but add a more formal flair. At its most formal for a four- or five-course meal, you can add a fish fork to the outside left and fish knife to the outside right, plus an oyster fork on the far outside right.
Anthropologie Old Havana Bread Plates, Set of 4 By Anthropologie in Red Size S/4 canape
Anthropologie Old Havana Bread Plates, Set of 4 By Anthropologie in Red Size S/4 canape
Styling Tips
Once you have the order figured out, it’s time for the fun part—which china and glassware to use. “I don’t think there are any rules that don’t have an exception,” Gardner says. “Think about the occasion and the comfort of your guests—go bonkers. Do make sure your linens are starched and make as much effort as you can.” Bring in unique or heirloom plates and colored glassware where you can to add personality.
You’ll also want to consider the middle of the table and how to dress it up with floral arrangements or candles as a centerpiece, or perhaps add greenery or a runner for the center of the table. (You'll want to make it extra special for Thanksgiving or Christmas, of course.)
Estelle Hand-Blown Colored Wine Glasses (Set of 6)
Estelle Hand-Blown Colored Wine Glasses (Set of 6)
Don’t forget about the overhead lights either. “Flattering light is more important than extravagant flowers,” Gardner says. “Dim the overhead lights and use short votives and tall tapers that cast pools of flattering light at several levels. Everyone looks beautiful in moody light and everyone has more fun when they look beautiful.”
What about place cards? Gardner says they are a must if you have gone to the effort of hosting this dinner and setting the table just right. They should be placed above the dinner plate and dessert fork and/or spoon, and if you are adding a salt and pepper shaker for each guest, put them on either side of the place card. “Your guests are most important, the reason for the effort,” she says. “Make sure they have entertaining neighbors.”
Last but certainly not least, “I always make sure that no matter how dressy the table, there is something a little silly or weird tucked into the grandeur,” Gardner says. “How about plastic toy insects perching on fat peony blossoms or a party cracker with irreverent parlor games? Give them something to talk about!” And THAT is how to create a memorable dinner party.
